AITA for secretly paying my husband’s new partner to get pregnant and then ghost him so he loses both of us?

Welcome back, dear readers, to another deep dive into the moral quandaries of the internet! Today’s story isn't just a tale of marital woes or an unfortunate breakup; it’s a masterclass in calculated, chilling revenge that will undoubtedly spark furious debate. We've seen a lot of 'AITA' posts, but this one takes the concept of getting even to an entirely new, almost cinematic level of intricate planning and emotional manipulation. Prepare yourselves, because this one is truly wild.
Our original poster (OP) has laid out a scenario that sounds like something straight out of a thriller novel, where a heartbroken spouse plots a long game against their unfaithful partner. The question isn't just about whether OP is an 'A-hole,' but about the very boundaries of justice, vengeance, and the collateral damage left in its wake. Let’s unravel this tangled web of deceit and discuss the ethical implications.

"AITA for secretly paying my husband's new partner to get pregnant and then ghost him so he loses both of us?"
My life imploded six months ago when my husband announced he was leaving me for someone else. We had been together for over a decade, and the betrayal was a physical ache. I was shattered, confused, and utterly lost. After the initial shock wore off, a dark, simmering anger began to replace my grief. I wanted him to hurt as much as I did, to truly understand the depth of what he'd thrown away.
I started researching his new partner, not to confront her, but to understand her. She was younger, successful, and seemed genuinely smitten with him. That's when the idea, twisted as it was, began to form. I knew he wanted children, something we had always discussed but never pursued. I found a way to anonymously contact her, pretending to be a wealthy benefactor interested in supporting women pursuing motherhood, offering a substantial sum for 'future family planning assistance.' She was initially wary, but the amount was significant enough to entice her.
Over the next few months, I facilitated payments, always anonymously, always with the understanding that she would use the funds to 'secure her future family.' My goal was simple: get her pregnant with his child, then vanish, leaving him with a new family unit that would eventually crumble without my presence. I knew she was deeply in love and would eventually want children with him. My payments just accelerated her timeline, removing financial barriers she might have considered.
She eventually informed 'her benefactor' that she was pregnant. I feigned congratulations, making one final, large deposit. That same week, after ensuring the news was confirmed, I packed a bag, drained our joint accounts (which I legally had access to, as we were still technically married), and left a single, unsigned note: 'You wanted a new life. Now live with the consequences of losing everything.' I changed my number, deleted all social media, and moved to a different state. I haven't heard from him, but the thought of his dawning realization fills me with a cold satisfaction. I know I manipulated an innocent person, but the pain he inflicted was unbearable. AITA for this extreme revenge?
This is a story that immediately makes one question the boundaries of morality and justice. On one hand, the original poster (OP) was undoubtedly subjected to immense pain and betrayal. The end of a decade-long relationship due to infidelity is a traumatic event, and it's understandable that someone would crave a sense of retribution when feeling so discarded and helpless. The desire for the other party to experience a fraction of that hurt is a common human reaction, however unhealthy.
However, the method of revenge employed here crosses several ethical lines. The deliberate manipulation of a third, largely innocent party (the new partner) is deeply problematic. She was an unwitting pawn in a scheme that could have devastating psychological and practical consequences for her and the unborn child. While she might have been involved with the OP's husband, she likely had no idea of the depths of the OP's suffering or the calculated trap being set.
Furthermore, the long-term impact on the child is a significant concern. They are entering a world where their parents' relationship was engineered by a vengeful third party, potentially built on a foundation of deception that could very well fall apart. While the OP is punishing the ex-husband, the ripple effects of this action extend far beyond him, impacting a vulnerable new family unit in ways that are hard to predict or control.
Ultimately, while the OP's pain is valid, the question remains whether such extreme and manipulative actions are justifiable. Does a profound wrong committed against you give you license to inflict calculated harm on others, even those indirectly involved? This is a moral dilemma with no easy answers, and one that forces us to confront the true cost of 'getting even.'
The Internet Weighs In: Vengeance or Villainy?
The comments section for this post is a fiery battleground, as expected. Many users are absolutely aghast, condemning the original poster as manipulative and cruel, especially for involving an innocent pregnant woman and potentially a child in her scheme. They argue that while the husband's actions were terrible, the OP's response is disproportionate and morally reprehensible, potentially creating lasting trauma for several individuals.
Conversely, a strong contingent is rallying behind the original poster, viewing her actions as a brilliant, albeit dark, form of 'karma.' They argue that the husband deserved to lose everything after his betrayal, and that the OP's cunning was merely a reflection of her deep pain. This camp often emphasizes the emotional toll of infidelity and sees this revenge as a twisted but effective way to reclaim power.





This particular AITA story truly pushes the boundaries of what is considered acceptable, even in the realm of internet confessions. While the pain of betrayal is undeniable and can drive people to desperate measures, the calculated manipulation and the involvement of innocent parties in this revenge plot raise serious ethical questions. It forces us to reflect on whether 'an eye for an eye' ever truly brings peace, or if it merely perpetuates a cycle of harm, leaving deeper scars than before. There are no easy answers here, only a stark reminder of the complexities of human emotion and the often-destructive pursuit of vengeance.









