AITA for warning my 19-year-old daughter that if she doesn’t get curves soon, she’ll end up flat and unwanted like her mother became?

Welcome back, internet citizens, to another edition of 'Am I The Asshole?' where we dissect the sticky situations of everyday life. Today's submission is a truly jaw-dropping tale that has already ignited a firestorm across online communities. It delves into the delicate dynamics of family relationships, particularly between a parent and their child, and the often-unspoken rules of acceptable communication within the home.

Our poster, a father, believes he was simply offering 'guidance' to his 19-year-old daughter. However, the nature of this 'guidance' involves deeply personal and potentially damaging comments about body image and relationships, bringing his wife into the crosshairs as well. This one is less about nuance and more about a fundamental breakdown of empathy, leaving many wondering how such words could ever be uttered by a parent.

"AITA for warning my 19-year-old daughter that if she doesn't get curves soon, she'll end up flat and unwanted like her mother became?"

It's clear that the Original Poster (OP) believes he was acting out of concern for his daughter's future. He frames his comments as 'tough love' and a necessary dose of reality. However, the intent, no matter how well-meaning in the OP's mind, is completely overshadowed by the utterly destructive and deeply inappropriate nature of the message delivered. There's a chasm between constructive advice and outright emotional abuse.

The specific phrasing used, 'flat and unwanted like her mother became,' is nothing short of cruel. This isn't a neutral observation; it's a direct, searing insult aimed at his 19-year-old daughter's developing body and simultaneously a brutal denigration of his own wife. Such words can inflict profound psychological damage, fostering body image issues, insecurity, and a deep sense of betrayal.

Furthermore, the OP's comments reveal a concerning perspective on women, viewing their worth primarily through their physical attractiveness and specifically, their 'curves.' He projects his own dissatisfactions with his wife onto his daughter, creating a toxic inheritance of self-doubt. This kind of 'advice' teaches a young woman that her value is conditional on her physical attributes, and that her mother's 'unwanted' status is due to a perceived lack of 'curves'.

The fallout, with his daughter crying and his wife's furious reaction, is a direct consequence of his actions. He has not only alienated them but potentially damaged their trust and self-esteem for years to come. This isn't just a misstep; it's a severe breach of parental responsibility and marital respect, indicating a deep-seated lack of empathy and understanding of healthy relationships.

The Verdict Is In: The Internet Doesn't Hold Back!

Unsurprisingly, the comment section for this post has been an absolute landslide, with almost universal condemnation for the Original Poster. Readers are aghast at the father's words, calling them 'narcissistic,' 'abusive,' and 'unforgivable.' The consensus is clear: the OP is undoubtedly the asshole here, not just for his daughter but for his wife as well.

Many commenters expressed profound sadness for Emily and Sarah, suggesting they both deserve better than to be subjected to such demeaning commentary. There's a strong emphasis on the lasting psychological harm these words can inflict on a young woman's self-image and how it poisons the family dynamic. The community urges the wife to stand firm and for Emily to prioritize her mental well-being.

This story serves as a stark reminder of the immense power of words, particularly those spoken by parents to their children. What one person perceives as 'tough love' can be profoundly damaging emotional abuse to another. It underscores the critical importance of fostering self-esteem, respect, and unconditional love within a family, rather than imposing outdated or hurtful beauty standards. True parental guidance builds up; it doesn't tear down the very people it claims to care for. Let this be a lesson on choosing empathy over judgment.