AITA for telling my daughter her braces make her look like a kid and she should smile less?

Oh, the complexities of parenting! We all want our children to feel confident and beautiful, but sometimes, our words, even when meant with the best intentions, can cause more harm than good. Navigating the delicate waters of adolescence, body image, and self-esteem is a challenge every parent faces.
Today's AITA story brings this very dilemma to the forefront. It's a classic case of a parent giving 'advice' that backfired spectacularly, leaving their teenage daughter feeling hurt and self-conscious. Let's dive into the details and see if our community can shed some light on this tricky situation.

"AITA for telling my daughter her braces make her look like a kid and she should smile less?"





This post really highlights the fine line parents walk between offering guidance and inadvertently damaging a child's self-esteem. The original poster (OP) clearly states their intention was to 'help' Sarah project a more mature image, especially as she approaches high school. From the OP's perspective, this was a practical suggestion to navigate the social pressures of being a teenager, rather than an outright criticism.
However, the impact of the words often outweighs the intention. For a 15-year-old who was just starting to feel confident about a significant change to her appearance, hearing that her smile makes her look 'like a kid' and that she should 'smile less' can be incredibly crushing. Braces are a temporary phase, and a parent's role is usually to support and reassure, not to point out perceived flaws in a temporary condition.
The emotional response from Sarah – her smile dropping and running to her room – is a clear indicator of how deeply the comment affected her. Teenagers are particularly vulnerable to comments about their appearance, and these words can linger long after the braces are gone. It's crucial for parents to consider the emotional landscape of their children before offering such direct and potentially hurtful 'advice.'
Furthermore, the husband's reaction underscores the severity of the misstep. He recognized immediately that the comment was damaging and counterproductive to Sarah's burgeoning confidence. While OP might have genuinely believed they were helping, the delivery and content of the message were ultimately detrimental, teaching Sarah to be self-conscious rather than embracing her temporary smile.
The internet weighs in: Was OP truly trying to help, or just hurtful?
The comments section for this story was absolutely buzzing, and it's clear that the vast majority of our readers felt strongly that OP was indeed the A. Many users pointed out the fundamental difference between 'helping' and actively chipping away at a teenager's already fragile self-esteem. The consensus was that a parent's job is to build up confidence, not suggest ways to hide or diminish joy.
Several comments highlighted the irony of telling a child to smile less, especially when braces are meant to eventually create a beautiful smile. This story really struck a nerve for many who remember the struggles of self-consciousness during their own teenage years, especially concerning appearance. It serves as a powerful reminder for parents to choose their words wisely.



This AITA post serves as a poignant reminder that while parental intentions are often good, the impact of our words on our children, particularly teenagers, can be profound. Building up a child's self-esteem requires constant effort and careful communication. Instead of focusing on perceived flaws or societal expectations, nurturing a child's inner confidence and celebrating their happiness is paramount. Let this be a lesson for us all to pause and consider how our 'advice' might truly land before speaking, especially when it comes to something as personal as appearance and self-expression.









